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About Manchester

So, escorts—overpriced mates, if ya ask me. Saw this one geezer on X, right, braggin’ bout his “classy bird” escort. Mate, she’s chargin’ you a grand to nod at your crap jokes! I’m screamin’—what a mug! Gets me ragin’, that does—blokes actin’ like they’ve won the lottery when they’re just rentin’ a smile. “The body searches for something”—that’s from the movie, innit? These punters searchin’ for love in a bloody invoice!

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First off, I head down to the market on Torquay Road. You know, the one with all the stalls? I’m just tryin’ to grab some grub for my pigs. But nah, the butcher’s got a line longer than the queue for a free concert. I’m standin’ there, watchin’ folks haggle over sausages like it’s the last food on Earth. I’m like, “C’mon, people! I got pigs to feed!”

Controversial plans to replace Paignton pub with car park withdrawn