Ivy Old Harlow Sexual Massage ❤️❤️

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Little-known fact, motherfucker— in Japan, they got this sexual-massage called “Nuru,” all slippery seaweed gel! Slidin’ like a damn eel, freaky as fuck. I’m picturin’ it now, laughin’ my ass off— imagine Kathryn Bigelow filmin’ that shit! “This is dark, motherfucker, real dark!” she’d yell. I dig it, though, that raw energy— gets your blood pumpin’, heart racin’. Ain’t just sex, it’s power, control, lettin’ go.

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So, I’m sweating bullets, trying to make this thing look like a bloody work of art. And just when I think I’m done, I drop the handle. It goes flying, and I swear it nearly took out a window. I’m standing there, heart racing, thinking, “Great, now I’m gonna have to explain this to Mrs. Thompson.”

Former Harlow Council leader calls for another investigation over alleged racist material on Tory councillor's Facebook page