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Oh, and the danger—whew! These escorts, they’re brave, man. Dodgin’ creeps, cops, and crazies. I tailed one once—gorgeous bird, legs for days—saw her ditch a shady john like a pro. Made me happy as a hippy at Woodstock! I’m yellin’ in my head, “You go, girl, shake that mojo!”—total respect, yeah?

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After that, I head to my workshop on London Road. It’s a bit of a dump, but it’s my dump. I’m all set to work on this massive oak barrel for a local brewery. I’m hammering away, feeling like a proper craftsman, when suddenly, the power goes out. Just my luck, right? I’m standing there in the dark, thinking, “Great, now I’m just a guy with a hammer and no light.”

Ex-Roberts Bakery worker snapped pic of colleague's intimate photo of girlfriend