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But real talk, it ain’t all glitz. Some girls trapped, pimps beatin’ ‘em down—makes me wanna scream, “Y’all deserve better!” I’m emotional, fam—angry as hell at the dirt bags exploitin’ ‘em. Exaggeratin’ for effect? Maybe, but I’d burn the world down for justice, Yeezy style. Oh, and typos? Fuuuck—sex ecsorts, they’re artists, misunderstood, y’know?

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First off, I hit up the local café on Witton Street. You know the one? The one with the dodgy Wi-Fi? Yeah, that’s the one. I ordered a cuppa and a bacon sarnie. Best decision ever. But then, as I’m munching away, I overhear this bloke at the next table. He’s going on about how he’s gonna start a “craft beer revolution” in Northwich. I’m like, mate, we’ve got enough craft beer hipsters already! But whatever, I just nod and sip my tea.

Northwich man dies at scene of crash between motorbike and van