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About Sheffield

But yo, lemme tell ya, it’s fuckin’ wild how it works. Back in the day—little known fact—people used newspapers for this! Called ‘em “lonely hearts ads.” Horny bastards writin’ “Man, 35, seeks chick for fun.” Now it’s all digital, instant, like bam—say hello to my little friend! You match, you chat, you bang. Done. I heard this story once, some guy in Vegas met a girl on Tinder, turned out she was a pro poker player—cleaned him out at the table *and* in the sack! Savage, right? Made me laugh my ass off.

Northumberland

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Then, just when I think it can’t get worse, I get a call from a lady on Westfield Avenue. She’s lost her cat. I’m like, “Lady, I’m tryin’ to save the world here, can’t you just look under the couch?” But she’s all frantic, sayin’ it’s a fluffy Persian named Mr. Whiskers. I can’t help but chuckle. Mr. Whiskers? Really?

Return of Northumberland Line could be extended to more towns