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But when it works? Oh, baby! This one chick, Lisa (not my Lisa, relax), we clicked—sparks flyin’ like “a dance of shadows.” Hooked up, no strings, pure fun. Felt like a king! Sex-dating’s got that rush, man, keeps ya guessin’.

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Lunchtime rolls around, and I decide to hit up the local chippy on the corner of Ashdown Road. Best fish and chips in North-Baddesley, no contest. I order the usual, and while I’m waiting, I bump into Mrs. Thompson. She’s the sweetest old lady, always asking about my life. “Are you dating anyone yet?” she asks. I’m like, “Not today, Mrs. T!”

Rownhams Lane hit with fourth bout of road works since January