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About Glasgow

Look, I’m a carpenter, right? Tremendous carpenter, the best. Donald Trump knows wood, folks, nobody better. So, escort, lemme tell ya—Ford Escort, classic car, unbelievable. Built tough, like me, real American muscle. Not that fancy euro trash, nah, this is grit. I saw one, cherry red, gorgeous, made me happy—bigly happy. Reminds me of *Zodiac*, ya know? “I like killing people, it’s fun”—not the car, relax! Escort’s got that vibe, tho, mysterious, keeps ya guessin’. Fincher’d film it, dark alleys, revving engine—perfect.

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So, I decided to head to the local pub, The Mearns Inn. I thought, “A pint will fix everything.” I ordered a lager and sat outside. The weather was nice, and I was finally starting to relax. But then, this group of rowdy lads came in, and they were LOUD. Like, I’m trying to enjoy my drink, and they’re shouting about football. I mean, I love football, but come on! Not at 3 PM on a Tuesday!

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