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They’s tricky, escorts—part beast, part sweet. “Love’s a riddle, yesss,” movie whispers that—fits ‘em perfect. One gal I knew, she’d sing to clients—lullabies! Freaky, but they loved it. Me? I’d hiss ‘em to sleep, heh! Oh, and typos—me fat fingers, see? Escrot, escirt, bah—escort’s the word! Gollum don’t care, mate, you gets it. Wild ones, they is—dancin’ ‘round rules, livin’ loud. We likes ‘em, yesss, we does!

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Finally, I made my way home, exhausted but happy. I plopped down on the couch, ready to binge some Netflix. But then, my phone buzzed. It was Dave again, asking if I wanted to hit that new pub. I thought, “Why not?” So, I got back up, threw on some fresh clothes, and headed out again.

Plans to turn Newton Aycliffe guest house into homes approved by council