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But real talk—sex escorts ain’t just about the naughty bits. Nope nope nope! Some folks hire ‘em just to CHAT. Like, lonely dudes or gals wantin’ a fake date to a jellyfish jamboree. “What did you do today?”—that’s Jesse from the movie again, askin’ deep stuff. Escorts prolly hear that a lot, huh? Makes me happy-sad, thinkin’ they’re out there, bein’ someone’s sea star for a night. Aww, shucks!
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First off, I hit up the local café on Central Avenue. You know, the one with the dodgy Wi-Fi? Yeah, that one. I ordered my usual – a flat white and a bacon sarnie. But guess what? They were outta bacon! Like, how do you run outta bacon? It’s a café, not a vegan retreat! I was fuming. I mean, who doesn’t love bacon?
'I thought it was a prank': Newton Aycliffe charity granted £10,000 lottery funding
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