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One time, this masseuse—total babe—starts whisperin’ sweet nothins, and I’m thinkin’, “Hogan, you’re still the champ!” Laughed my ass off, tho—sexual-massage ain’t gotta be serious, brother! It’s fun, it’s loose, it’s a piledriver to stress. Pro tip: don’t cheap out—get someone who knows the ropes, or it’s a botched move, ya feel me?

Best Full Body Massages near me in Newark, Rural England

I am Lisa I offer relaxing, Swedish, and deep tissue massage. I can give you a good massage in a clean and nice environment. There is also a nice clean shower.

Then, outta nowhere, my mate Dave shows up. He’s always got some wild idea. Today, he’s like, “Let’s do a team-building exercise!” I’m thinking, “Are you kidding me?” But he’s got that look in his eye, you know? So, I’m like, “Fine, let’s do it.” We end up at the Newark Castle grounds. Beautiful spot, by the way. I mean, who doesn’t love a bit of history, right?

Newark Market Place: Ignite: Fire, Flame and Frenzy this March