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Fun fact—studies say 1 in 5 hookups start online now. Disgustin’. People too lazy to hit a bar? What’s next, robot wives? Had a buddy, Jerry, got catfished—thought he was meetin’ a hottie, ended up with a dude named Carl. Laughed my ass off, then punched a wall. This crap’s a gamble—half the time, you’re dodgin’ creeps or STDs. “Let’s keep this moment,” Bob says. Yeah, keep it away from me, pal.

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The Wellness Center provides limited primary healthcare services and mental health resources to support students in reaching their optimal health.

So, I head over to the office on Station Road. The traffic was a nightmare. I mean, come on, it’s New-Stevenston, not London! But no, every car in the town decided to be on the road at the same time. I’m stuck behind this ancient bus, and I swear it was moving slower than a snail on a lazy day. I’m fuming, thinking about all the time I’m losing.

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