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Then there’s the blokes—aye, escorts ain’t just lassies! Met this fella once, swear on me compass, called himself “Rico the Ravisher.” Total codswallop name, right? Had a tattoo o’ a rose on his arse—said it got him extra tips. Laughed me hat off! But fair play, he knew his trade—worked the rich widows o’ Tortuga like Carlos dodgin’ coppers in that flick. “I’m not a prisoner, I’m a free man!” he’d yell, quotin’ the movie, struttin’ off with their jewels. Clever bastard, that one.

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Once we’re back inside, I’m trying to focus, but my mind’s racing. I’m thinking about the old mills around here. New-Mills has this rich history, right? The old cotton mills, the Peak Forest Canal, all that jazz. It’s beautiful, but sometimes I feel like the town’s stuck in time.

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