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Alright, motherfucker, let’s talk escort! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ ‘bout that slick ride, not the ladies, nah, the Ford Escort, that boxy lil’ beast from the ‘80s. Shit, man, it ain’t no Rolls-Royce, but it’s got soul, ya dig? Like in *The Headless Woman*, when Vero’s drivin’, lost as fuck, that Escort’s got the same vibe—confused, banged up, but still rollin’. “I didn’t see anything,” she says, but motherfucker, I SEE IT ALL with that car!

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First stop, I’m rollin’ down the High Street. You know, the one with all the shops and that fancy old church? Yeah, that place. I’m cruisin’ along, and suddenly, this pigeon decides to play chicken with my tractor. Like, mate, you really wanna test me? I swerve, nearly take out a lamppost. I’m shoutin’ at the bird like it can hear me. “Get outta the way, ya feathery menace!”

Record attendances and increased prize money notice in racecourse's annual report