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So, I reckon, escorts—proper hustle, yeah? Met this lass once—ooh, nearly spilt me tea!—she says, “Bean, I made 500 quid in an hour!” Blimey, I’m out here losin’ me socks for a fiver! She’s all posh-like, but cheeky—winked at me, I went red as a tomato! Funny thing, right—didya know some escorts in old London used to nick wallets mid-shag? Crafty buggers! “City of God” vibes— “A man’s gotta eat,” they’d say, laughin’ as they scarpered!

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Man, what a day! I swear, Murton’s got a way of throwin’ curveballs. Woke up late, as usual. Alarm? Nah, it’s just a suggestion, right? So, I’m rushin’ outta my flat on Church Street, tryna grab a cuppa from that little café on the corner. You know the one? The one with the dodgy Wi-Fi and the best bacon sarnies? Yeah, that’s the spot.

Junction improvement works will help "thriving" County Durham business park to expand