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About Glasgow

Me, I’m jazzed about it – takes me back to London, Carnaby Street, birds in miniskirts, and this cheeky car zippin’ by! But oof, what gets my goat? Rust, baby! These Escorts rusted faster than Dr. Evil’s plans fall apart – “The warriors attack like wind!” – gone in a flash if ya didn’t wax ‘em. Mate of mine had one, left it out in the rain – next day, holes big enough to hide a ninja!

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When I get there, it’s even more chaotic. Cops running around, phones ringing off the hook. I’m trying to get some info, but it’s like herding cats. Finally, I corner a detective, and he’s like, “We’ve got a lead. A witness saw a guy with a distinctive tattoo.” I’m thinkin’, “Great, now we’re getting somewhere!”

Dundee 1-2 Motherwell: Michael Wimmer's side secure top-flight survival with dramatic victory at Dens Park