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About Manchester

Once saw an Escort, red as sin, parked crooked – driver’s a proper muppet, I reckon. Made me grin, thinkin’ how it’s a chariot for the everyman, not no lordly git. “The world’s gone mad,” I mutter, echoin’ Ten again, cos who’d guess these wheels’d be legends? Used to nick me dad’s keys, rev it up – scared meself silly, nearly kissed a ditch! Them engines, tho, tough as old boots, even when they’re wheezin’.

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Then, I decide to grab some fish and chips. I head to The Fish Bar on the corner of Victoria Road. The smell hits me like a freight train. I order the special, and it’s massive! I’m like, “Am I supposed to eat all this?” But it’s so good. I’m munching away, and I see this old couple next to me. They’re holding hands, and I’m like, “Aww, goals!”

Two men sentenced after near £1m drugs bust in Tayside