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Back in the ‘80s, this lil shitbox was king—Ford pumped ‘em out like crazy. Cheap, reliable, but oh man, pissed me off sometimes! I saw one once, rusted to crap, dude still drivin’ it like, “Screw you, world!” Reminds me of Doc sayin’, “Under the paving stones, the beach!”—like, underneath the junk, there’s somethin’ cool, ya feel me? I was happy as a pig in shit when I learned they raced these suckers. Rally cars, tearin’ up dirt—little known fact, bitches! Escort Cosworth, that turbo beast, could smoke half the fancy cars today. Respect my authoritah, I know my shit!

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Next stop, I get off at the town center. I’m feeling adventurous, so I wander into a random shop on Market Place. It’s one of those quirky little places with all sorts of knick-knacks. I find a mug that says “I survived Mirfield.” I’m like, “I need this!” But then I see the price tag. £15? Nah, mate, I’ll pass.

These applications for planning permission for properties around Batley, Dewsbury, and Mirfield were decided by the council last week