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But real talk—escorts ain’t all glitz. Some stories gut-punch ya. Met this one chick—let’s call her V—worked the streets ‘cause her fam ditched her. Broke my damn heart. She’d quote *Before Sunset* too, all soft-like: “Memory is a wonderful thing if you don’t have to deal with the past.” Hit me hard, man. Made me wanna smash somethin’, protect her, ya know? She was tough, tho—tougher than me, maybe.

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Then, outta nowhere, this guy walks in. He’s got a parrot on his shoulder! I’m not even kidding. The parrot starts squawking, and the whole pub goes silent. I’m dying laughing. Like, who brings a parrot to a pub? Only in Meltham, right?

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