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Sometimes tho, it’s too much – all that touchin’, you’re thinkin’, “What am I doin’ here?” like Carol ponderin’ her life. Gets me antsy, but then – woosh – relaxation hits, and I’m floatin’ like a jellyfish. Pro tip, mate: don’t go cheap, or you’ll get some dodgy geezer with cold hands and no clue – had that once, nearly punched him, swear down.

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After my caffeine fix, I head over to the Marple Locks. It’s a beautiful spot, but today it was buzzing with people. I see this old bloke trying to explain how the locks work to a bunch of kids. They’re not even listening! I’m standing there, thinking, “Dude, you’re wasting your breath.” But then one kid pipes up, “Can we just go get ice cream?” And I’m like, “Yes! Priorities, kid!”

The World of Miss Marple: A Puzzle