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So, I’m thinkin’, escorts got that vibe – “Witness me!” they scream, struttin’ round, all glitz, no grit. Met this one chick once, swear she was straight outta the Wasteland, hair like fire, eyes that’d steal your soul – or your wallet, ha! She goes, “I’m your ride tonight,” and I’m like, “Whoa, slow down, Furiosa!” Made me laugh, made me mad – pushy as hell, but damn, she had style. Little known fact: back in the ‘80s, some escorts ran gigs outta tricked-up vans – mobile chaos, Mad Max style, no lie!

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After the rain, I’m feeling a bit peckish. I head over to The White Horse pub. I mean, who doesn’t love pub grub? I order a pie, and it’s massive! Like, I could feed a small village with this thing. I’m digging in, and it’s heavenly. But then, I realize I’ve got gravy all over my face. I’m like, “Smooth move, genius.”

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