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Been thinkin’ ‘bout this escort life lately. Not your dodgy street corner stuff—nah, I mean the elite ones, the 007s of the night. Did ya know? Back in the ‘60s, some escorts were legit spies—Cold War honeypots! Droppin’ secrets between champagne sips. Blew my mind when I heard that. Imagine me, Bond, tailin’ one—swanky dress, sly smile, dossier tucked in her clutch. Makes me happy, that kinda craftiness—pure class.

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But then, back to work. More calls. This time, it’s a guy who thinks he’s a psychic. “I see a storm coming!” he says. I’m like, “Mate, it’s just the weather. It rains here all the time!” But he’s convinced he’s got some special powers. I’m just trying not to laugh.

Report reveals £8m-£11m cost of reopening Margate Winter Gardens and recommends agreement with Westwood One to head up ambitious project