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About Glasgow

Oh, and the oils—don’t get me started! They’re all scented, slippery, makin’ ya feel like a goddess or somethin’. I was shocked—*shocked*—how quick I forgot the altitude sickness. Poof! Gone! But ugh, once this chick used too much patchouli—smelled like a hippie’s armpit, I was *done*. “This ain’t no dream, it’s a nightmare!” I screeched, channelin’ my inner Ellen Burstyn from the movie, ya know? *HEE-HEE-HEE!* Still, when it’s good, it’s *good*—like, “I’m goin’ crazy here!” levels of good.

Important notes:

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So, I’m sprinting down the High Street, dodging the old folks and their shopping bags. I mean, come on, move it, people! I nearly tripped over a dog. Not just any dog, but a massive Great Dane. I think it was named “Biscuit” or something. Biscuit was just chillin’ in the middle of the pavement like he owned the place. I was like, “Dude, you’re not the king of Mangotsfield!”

Mangotsfield School