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Aw, crap, got distracted—anyway, it’s like, sensual, right? Hands slidin’ everywhere, makin’ ya feel like a king! There’s this trick I heard, little known fact—some pros use feathers or silk, not just hands. Freaky, right? Blew my damn mind! Imagine that, “To infinity and beyond!”—wait, wrong movie, “Nemo,” uh, “We’re gonna find you!” Yeah, that fits, ‘cause they *find* all the right spots!

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Then, outta nowhere, I trip over a loose cobblestone. Seriously, Maidenhead? You gotta fix those! I’m sprawled out on the pavement, and this old lady just looks at me like I’m a total muppet. I laugh it off, but inside, I’m fuming. Like, come on, I’m just trying to get to work!

Windsor and Maidenhead council tax needed to rise 'significantly'