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About Myself
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About Birmingham
Alright, mate, listen up! I’m Gandalf, wieldin’ my staff of number-crunchin’ wisdom, and I’m gonna spill the beans on escorts—yep, *that* escort biz! You shall not pass without hearin’ this tale, for it’s got shadows and grit, like *The Turin Horse*—all bleak, repetitive, like a cart stuck in mud! Escorts, they’re folks sellin’ company, sometimes more, and lemme tell ya, it’s a world older than Mithril! Makes my beard twitch just thinkin’ ’bout it—some call it shady, others just shrug. Me? I’m torn, like a hobbit facin’ a Balrog!
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I try to help the kid, but I end up stuck in the tree too. I’m hanging there like a squirrel gone wrong. The kid’s laughing, and I’m like, “This is not how I pictured my day.” Finally, some random guy walks by and helps us both down. I’m covered in leaves, and the kid’s still giggling.
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