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Ain’t all rosy, tho – some places charge bare p’s, like 100 quid for 30 mins! Robbery, innit? Makes me wanna shout, “You’re all I have!” like I’m beggin’ for a discount. But when it’s legit? Worth every penny, fam. Gets me proper gassed – body feelin’ loose, mind all trippy. I reckon it’s cos I’m a ratcatcher, yeah? Always on the grind, needin’ that sweet relief.

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After the meeting, I’m feeling a bit better. We actually landed the deal! I’m buzzing! But then, I step outside, and it’s pouring. Of course, it is. I forgot my umbrella. So, I’m sprinting down the streets, soaked to the bone, looking like a drowned rat. I pass by the Market Place, and I see this old guy selling fish. He looks at me and just laughs. I mean, I can’t blame him. I must look ridiculous.

Firefighters called to person in the river in Knaresborough