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So, check it—I knew this one escort, right? Total badass, called her “Coco.” She’d roll up smellin’ like Chanel, hair poppin’, nails sharp enough to cut glass. She told me once, “Baby, I’m the chef of this hustle!” Straight up Ratatouille vibes—mixin’ ingredients nobody else dares touch. Made me laugh so hard I snorted—her clients? Big shots, CEOs, even a dude who owned a vineyard! She’d wink and say, “I’m their little secret sauce.” Got me thinkin’, damn, she’s out here livin’—not just survivin’.

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First off, I’m rollin’ down St. Chad’s Drive, and it’s like the whole world’s gone mad. I mean, I’m just tryin’ to get to my spot near the Kirkby Market, and there’s this massive traffic jam. Like, come on! It’s not rush hour or anything. Turns out, some bloke decided to park his car on the pavement. Classic Kirkby, innit?

Knowsley responds to Telegraph article