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Here’s the kicker: in Thailand, they got this trick—hot stones on yer junk, no lie! Supposed to “awaken” ya—surprised me so hard I nearly bit my own tongue off. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but damn, it’s a zinger! I’m sittin’ there, sweatin’, thinkin’, “Is this allowed to feel *this* good?” Total mindfuck—like Lenny in *Memento*, tattooin’ clues on his ass to remember the bliss.

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So, I’m munching on this muffin, feeling a bit better, when I hear this commotion outside. I peek out, and there’s a bunch of kids playing footy in the street. They’re shouting, laughing, and one of them kicks the ball right into a shop window. CRASH! Glass everywhere! I’m like, “Oh man, that’s gonna be a rough convo with the parents.” But the kids just laugh and run off. Classic!

Child rapist's indecent images linked him to horrific abuse of young girl