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About Myself
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About Birmingham
I dove into this sex-dating malarkey, apps buzzin’ like bees. Tinder, Bumble—fie, the choices! Found this lass, curves like a fresh-baked bun, and we chat. She’s all “wyd,” I’m like “bakin’, thou?” Next thing, we’re meetin’ at some dodgy pub. Heart’s poundin’—will she ghost? She don’t! Happy as a pig in mud, I was. But then, mate, she starts yappin’ ‘bout her ex mid-date—anger boilin’ like overproofed dough! “Fuck it, we’re done,” I nearly holler, but I chill. “The city’s a cage,” Monty’d say—aye, datin’s the bars.
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Man, what a day! I swear, if I had a quid for every crazy thing that happened, I’d be rich. So, I’m a mechanic, right? Just your average grease monkey, fixin’ up cars in Kidlington. You know, that little gem just north of Oxford? Yeah, that place.
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