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What surprised me? How Ford let it fade. Killed me a lil’—like, why ditch this gem? “The coffee’s still good here!”—that’s me, clingin’ to the Escort’s glory days. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I’d fight for this car. Quirky thought: I’d name mine Maria, after *White Material*’s badass lead. She’d get me, y’know? Me and Maria, cruisin’, livin’ loud. So yeah, Escort’s my jam—flawed, fierce, freakin’ unforgettable. You feelin’ me?

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First off, I’m running late. Classic me. I sprint down the High Street, dodging old folks and their dogs. Like, come on, I’ve got places to be! I’m supposed to meet my mate at The Swan for a pint. But nooo, I trip over a bloody cobblestone. Who even thought that was a good idea? I’m sprawled out on the pavement, feeling like a right muppet.

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