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“You’re the most wonderful person,” Cathy say in movie, and I say that to massage lady once. She blush, wery cute! I like how it sneaky — not just sexy, but heal you. Muscle go soft, brain go quiet, wery nice! Sometime cost too much, make me yell, “Why so pricey?!” But worth it, like good sheep in Kazakhstan.

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Then, outta nowhere, I get a call. Some ruckus at the park near the river. I sprint over, and what do I find? A bunch of teenagers havin’ a full-on water balloon fight. I mean, really? In the middle of the day? I’m tryin’ to keep a straight face, but it’s hard. They’re laughin’, shoutin’, and I’m just standin’ there, soaked from head to toe.

Five arrested and stolen vehicles recovered during dramatic police raids across Bedfordshire