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About Bristol

Angry tho—capitalist spas charge arm and leg! 5000 rubles for hour? Robbery! I’d rather bribe babushka wit vodka—she’d knead me good, heh. Surprised me once—friend says, “Gru, in Japan, it’s called Nuru—slippery seaweed gel!” Seaweed? Wild! I’m picturin’ sushi rollin’ over me—hilarious, da? Prolly smells fishy, but who cares—results, baby!

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First off, I hit up the local café on Station Road. You know, the one with the dodgy Wi-Fi? Yeah, that one. I ordered a flat white, thinking I’d start my day chill. But nah, the barista spills it all over me! Like, c’mon, mate! I’m not a coffee sponge! I was fuming, but then I saw this old bloke at the next table. He was chuckling, and I couldn’t help but laugh too.

A12 full diversion route as road shuts after 'serious' three vehicle crash