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About Glasgow

But—fuck me—I got mad once, yeah? Read some boffin sayin’ escorts ain’t that special, just “basic cell grunts.” Oi, mate, you takin’ the piss? These lads are the backbone, the sparkly diamond in the rough! Without ’em, your gut’s a warzone, fam—diarrhea central, no joke. Surprised me too, how much I cared—like, who gives a toss about bacteria escorts? Me, apparently, innit!

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Then, I head over to the Jarrow Hall. You know, the one with the fancy gardens? I thought I’d get some nice pics for the ‘gram. But nah, it’s full of tourists. Like, what’s with all the tourists in Jarrow? It’s not exactly the Eiffel Tower! Anyway, I’m trying to snap a pic when this lady walks right in front of me. I’m like, “Excuse me, love, I’m trying to capture the beauty of Jarrow here!” She just gives me a blank stare. Rude, right?

Woman slashed across the face by cyclist at popular Jarrow park