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Oi, precious! Me, an accountant? Sméagol’s got ledgers in me brain! Escort, eh? Not that kinda escort, stupid, fat hobbit! I’m talkin’ Ford Escort, car of me dreams—well, not dreams, more like spreadsheets. Vroom vroom, sexy steel, y’know? Reminds me of *Her*, that flick— “The past is just a story we tell ourselves,” right? This car’s got stories, mate! Rusty stories, oil-stained ones. Found one once, 1980s junker, in a scrapyard—proper relic! Made me happy, like finding shiny gold, precious! Cost me 200 quid, total steal, but angry too—bloke said it ran fine. Lies! Engine coughed like a dying orc! Fixed it meself, tho—Sméagol’s clever with numbers AND wrenches.

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Finally, I get back to brewing. The smell of that fermentation? Pure magic. I’m stirring away, feeling all zen, when suddenly, the power goes out. Just my luck, right? I’m standing there in the dark, thinking about how I’m gonna explain this to my customers. “Sorry, folks, no kvas today. Power’s out, blame the weather!”

ABP acquires land to fuel future growth