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About Liverpool

Still, it’s Jersey—everybody’s chasin’ tail. Apps make it easy, too easy, ya ask me. I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’, “Dis is whack,” but I get it—people lonely, horny, whatever. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I’d say 80% of dese dates end in bangin’ or ghostin’. Pick your poison. Oh, an’ don’t get me started on da STDs—wrap it up, you mooks! Gabagool? Ova here—sex-datin’s a mess, but damn, it’s our mess. Whaddya gonna do?

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So, I leave the museum, feeling a bit bummed. But then, I bump into my mate, Dave, on The Grove. He’s got this massive grin on his face. Turns out, he just got a promotion! I’m like, “You lucky git!” We grab a pint at the local pub, The Crescent. I’m chugging my drink, and he’s telling me all about his new job. I’m happy for him, but also a bit jealous. You know how it is.

Trent Alexander-Arnold to leave Liverpool after making ‘hardest decision’