Everly Ilkley Erotic Massage ❤️

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I’m picturin’ it—mumble, mumble—dim lights, some lass rubbin’ me shoulders, ooh! Hands slidin’, all sensual-like, not like me polishin’ a car bumper! Makes me giggle—hee hee—feels naughty but nice, y’know? “I’m diving into myself,” Bauby’d say, prob’ly, if he got a massage. Bet he’d blink twice for “more oil!” Hah!

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Then, I decide to hit up the Ilkley Toy Museum. I’m a sucker for nostalgia. I walk in, and it’s like stepping back in time. I see all these old toys, and I’m like, “Where’s my childhood gone?” I spot a vintage action figure and nearly scream. I used to have that! But then, I see the price tag. I’m like, “Nah, mate, I’m not paying that!” I mean, who do they think I am? A millionaire?

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