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Lemme spill some tea – back in the day, sex-dating wasn’t even a thing, right? You had to charm folks at bars, not just send a dick pic and pray. Now it’s all instant, bam, like fast food – Big Mac of booty calls! Fun fact: they say 1 in 5 hookups start online now. Blew my mind! Makes me happy, tho – people gettin’ theirs, livin’ free, y’know? But it pisses me off when jerks ghost after a hookup. Like, c’mon, man, own it! “We are not the same person,” like Uncle Boonmee says – you don’t gotta be a dick ‘bout it.

Abbie Chatfield Spills On Her Sex Life With BF Adam Hyde: ‘I Don’t Know If This Is TMI, But…’

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Started off on Market Street. You know, the one with all the shops? I was just grabbing a coffee from that little café, the one with the dodgy Wi-Fi. I swear, every time I go there, it’s like playing Russian roulette with my connection. Anyway, I’m waiting in line, and this bloke in front of me drops his phone. Like, full-on faceplant. I’m thinking, “Mate, you okay?” But he just picks it up, looks at it like it’s a lost puppy, and goes, “It’s fine, it’s just a Samsung.” I mean, come on! It’s not like it’s a rare artifact or something.

BST Hyde Park Darts Championship to take place in July