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Real talk tho – the money’s wild. These apps pull like $4 bil a year globally – horny folks droppin’ cash for boosts and super-likes. Makes me happy seein’ people chase tail so bad they’ll fund a whole industry. But what pisses me off? The catfishes, man! Some sketchy weirdo usin’ fake pics – that’s a bad investment, fam. Wasted time, wasted cash. I heard this story once – dude flew cross-country for a hookup, turns out it’s a 50-year-old trucker named Earl. Earl! Can you smell what The Rock is cookin’? That’s a scam I’d body-slam into next week.

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But then, the day takes a turn. I’m walkin’ back to the stables, and I see this group of lads on the High Street. They’re laughin’ and drinkin’, and I’m thinkin’, “Ah, to be young and carefree.” But then, one of ‘em trips and spills his drink all over his mate. It’s a right mess!

Peter Hook talks Substance, Longevity, and his Favourite New Order LP