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Little fact—did ya know? Back in the ‘90s, swingers had secret clubs. No apps, just word-of-mouth, crazy shit. Now? Everyone’s on their phone, bangin’ strangers. Progress, folks, tremendous progress. I’m like, wow, surprised how fast it blew up. Used to be taboo, now it’s normal—fantastic!

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After that, I stroll down to the park. It’s a nice day, and I’m feeling good. I mean, who doesn’t love a bit of fresh air? But then, outta nowhere, this dog runs up to me. Not just any dog, but a massive Great Dane! I’m talking like, “Is this a horse or a dog?” It jumps up, and I’m like, “Whoa, chill, buddy!” I nearly spill my coffee. But then, the owner, this old bloke, comes over and starts cracking jokes. He’s like, “Don’t worry, he’s just saying hi!” I’m laughing, but inside I’m like, “Yeah, saying hi with a mouth the size of my head!”

Harry Styles fans go wild after spotting him in hometown Holmes Chapel - en route to Blackpool