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About London

Back in ‘17, heard tell o’ this lass in Tortuga—well, London—who met a bloke on Plenty o’ Fish. Fella sent her a pigeon—nah, text—sayin’ he’s a lord. Turns out, he’s a bleedin’ fishmonger! She shacked up anyway, ‘cause the cod was fresh. True story, mate! Little known fact: them apps got more bots than a ship’s got rats. Surprised me, it did—half me matches be talkin’ like parrots, repeatin’ “hey sexy” till I wanna keelhaul ‘em.

Naughty Banging with Gorgeous Bitches in Highams Park is tremendous!

Our community boasts an incredible array of locally run clubs, groups and classes that cater to all interests and passions.

First off, I had a meeting at the café on the corner of The Avenue. You know, that little spot with the best flat whites? I’m all about that caffeine life. So, I’m there, laptop open, ready to crush some product strategy. But then, bam! Power outage. Like, really? In the middle of my genius ideas? I’m sitting there, staring at my screen like it’s gonna magically turn back on. Nope. Just my luck.

Highams Park makes Sunday Times’ Best Places to Live list