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Movies like *Certified Copy* mess with ya head—“Are we strangers or lovers?”—and escorts? Same deal. One minute she’s your gal, next she’s gone, poof, like smoke. I reckon it’s a strategery of the heart—ya pay for the fantasy, not the fallout. Ever hear ‘bout that Russian oligarch? Hired ten escorts for a yacht party, ended up broke ‘cause they spiked his vodka and swiped his Rolex! Laughed my butt off—dumbass deserved it, struttin’ like a peacock.

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So, I roll into the shop on Market Square, right? The sun’s barely up, and I’m already feelin’ the heat. I’m thinkin’, “Great, another day of slicin’ meat and dealin’ with customers.” But then, BOOM! The first customer walks in. It’s Mrs. Thompson from Church Street. She’s all flustered, talkin’ about her cat, Mr. Whiskers. Apparently, he’s gone missing. I’m like, “Lady, I’m a butcher, not a cat detective!” But I nod and pretend to care.

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