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But yo, pisses me off—some parlors fake it, actin’ all “spiritual” then bam, $20 extra for nothin’! Rip-off artists, man, I’d knock ‘em out! Still, when it’s real—damn—hands hittin’ spots ya didn’t know ya had, it’s like “a woman’s resilience amazes me” from the flick. Surprised me first time, legit thought “this ain’t boxin’, this is better!” Hella awkward too—dude’s breathin’ all heavy, I’m like “chill, bro, I ain’t ya date!” Laughed my ass off after.

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While I’m on the phone, the old lady’s makin’ a scene. She’s shoutin’ about how I’m a scam artist. I’m like, “Lady, I’m just tryin’ to make a livin’ here!” But she’s not lettin’ up. Finally, I just tell her to chill. She storms out, and I’m left wonderin’ if I’ll ever see her again.

Hedon Pooka – the black rabbit.