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She’s cheap, too, affordable lil’ beastie. Poor folks loved her, me too, cos we’s poor, heh! But parts? Nightmare, rusted junk, pissed us off! Gollum hates fixin’, Sméagol whines, “Why bother?” Still, she’s got charm, ugly-pretty, like us, yesss. “Every dream has its price,” movie growls – escort’s price? Yer sanity, mate!

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Then, outta nowhere, this kid runs up. He’s like, “Can I have a free sample?” I’m like, “Sure, mate! But only if you promise to fly!” He laughs, and I’m thinking, “This kid gets it.” But then, his mum shows up, and she’s not having it. She’s all, “Don’t take stuff from strangers!” I’m like, “Lady, I’m not a creep! I’m just a promoter!”

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