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About Bristol

So, escortin’, it’s old as dirt – fact! Back in Rome, they had fancy ladies, lupanars they called ‘em, brothels with style. Sneaky history, eh? Makes me grin, thinkin’ how little’s changed. Met this one escort, right, all sass, told me she banked 2k in a night – cash, no tax, bam! Made me jealous, yesss, “My precious!” – why ain’t I that bold? Pissed me off too, tho – she said some johns get creepy, pushy, actin’ like they own her. Hate that, I do, makes me wanna claw somethin’!

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First off, I head to the café on the corner of Boltro Road. You know the one? The little place with the best scones in town. I order my usual – a flat white and a scone. But guess what? They’re out of scones! Like, how do you run out of scones in Haywards-Heath? I mean, c’mon! I’m standing there, fuming, like I just lost a million bucks.

Cold comfort for Haywards Heath as West Hoathly win bowls season opener