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About Myself
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About Newcastle
We hates it, tho—too many liars. Profiles sayin’ “6ft, ripped”—shows up 5’2” and wheezin’. Pisses me off! And the ghostin’? Match, chat, poof—gone! Like, why bother, ya wankers? Sex-dating’s a cesspool—drownin’ in horny fools. “You see the glory?”—nah, Malick, not here! Just sweaty regret. Stay away, precious—stick to fishies and quiet nights!
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So, I’m wrestling with this ancient piece of tech, and my colleague, Dave, strolls in like he’s on a catwalk. “Need a hand?” he smirks. I’m like, “Nah, I’m just auditioning for a horror movie.” He laughs, but I’m not in the mood. I finally get it working, and boom! Paper everywhere. I’m talking confetti level.
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