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About Newcastle

Once got an escort ride—dude was silent, creepy as hell. Pissed me off! Like, talk, man! Then he blasts Metallica—surprised me good. Ate my shorts on that one! Little known fact: some escorts train like spies—dodgin’ paparazzi, crazy routes. Ain’t that nuts? Thought in my head: “This guy’s James Bond, yo!”

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Then, I head over to the Hassocks train station. It’s a small place, but it’s got character, ya know? I’m waiting for the 10:15 to Brighton, and this kid starts crying. Like, full-on wailing. Turns out, he lost his ice cream. I mean, I get it, but dude, it’s just ice cream! So, I buy him a new one. Yeah, I’m a softie. But hey, it made me feel like a hero for a hot sec.

Disneyland fundraiser for Hassocks girl losing her sight makes more than £6,000