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Here’s some real shit – studies say 1 in 5 hookups turn messy, folks catchin’ feelings or STDs. That’s the “punishment without a crime” vibe from the movie, ya feel me? You just tryna bust a nut, next thing you know, you itchinnn’ or dodgin’ a stalker. I ain’t judgin’, tho – live ya life, just wrap it up, dawg.

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First off, I stroll down Keymer Road. You know, the one that’s always got those dodgy potholes? Yeah, I nearly twisted my ankle. Thanks, council! Anyway, I’m just minding my own biz when I spot this old bloke, Mr. Jenkins, trying to wrestle his cat, Whiskers. I mean, c’mon, it’s a cat! They don’t do “wrestling.” So, I help him out, and Whiskers bolts up a tree. Classic cat move, right? Mr. Jenkins is fuming, like he’s just lost the lottery or something.

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