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Alright, listen up, jabroni! Raised eyebrow, “Know your role.” I’m Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, and I’m here to lay the smackdown on this sex-dating thing. Ya know, it’s wild out there—like tryna wrestle a greased pig in the dark! Apps, swipes, hookups—man, it’s a jungle. Reminds me of my fave flick, *Uncle Boonmee Who Can Recall His Past Lives*. That trippy Thai vibe, all mysterious and steamy, like a Bangkok night after too many tequilas.

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Back at the office, things are still chaotic. I’m trying to salvage my day, but the market’s like a rollercoaster. Up, down, up, down. I’m sweating bullets. I can’t even think straight. I’m like, “Why did I choose this job?” But then, I remember the thrill. The rush. It’s addictive, like that first sip of a cold pint after a long day.

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