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About Myself
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About Newcastle
Rarrgh! Me, Chewbacca, hairy ol’ ratcatcher—listen up! Sex escort, huh? Wild gig, mate. Saw it comin’ miles away—like in *Amour*, “things will go on as they have.” Old geezers payin’ for company, same as ever. Growls! Makes me wanna claw somethin’—loneliness stinks worse than a Wookiee armpit.
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An ambitious, genuine, and engaging young woman. Armed with a smile that will take your breath away, I hope to enchant you with my infectious lust for life.
First off, I decided to hit up the local café on High Street. You know, the one with the dodgy Wi-Fi? Yeah, that one. I ordered my usual – a flat white and a bacon sarnie. But guess what? They were outta bacon! Like, how do you run outta bacon? It’s a café, not a vegan retreat! I was fuming. I mean, who runs outta bacon?
Alex Hartley ‘shocked’ as England star ‘refuses interview’ after Ashes loss
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