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Check this – it’s ancient, yeah? Them Greeks was at it, callin’ it some fancy sh*t, “anatripsis,” gettin’ all slippery wid it. Makes me happy, fam, cos it’s like, humanity’s been horny forever, ya get me? But I’m vexed too – why ain’t more peeps talkin’ bout this? Is it ’cos I is black? Nah, it’s cos society’s bare uptight, bruv!

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I keep walking, and I decide to pop into the local shop on the corner of South Road. I’m just browsing, and I see this weird gadget. It’s like a banana slicer or something. Who needs that? I mean, come on! I can slice a banana with a knife, thank you very much. But I can’t help but laugh. I take a pic and send it to my mate. “Look what I found!”

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