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About Glasgow

Sex-dating’s a game, innit? Half the punters don’t even show up—ghostin’s the new blitzkrieg. Did ya know there’s stats sayin 1 in 5 dates from apps flop cos someone bails? Shocking, but I ain’t surprised. People’re flaky as fuck. Still, I reckon it’s worth it—met this one bird, proper stunner, had a laugh over beers. Thought, “This is it, the great beauty of it all!” Didn’t shag, mind—turns out she’s married. Fuckin typical!

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After that, I head over to the Grove’s community garden on The Green. It’s a lovely spot, full of veggies and herbs. I’m diggin’ away, and outta nowhere, this bloke starts talkin’ to me. Turns out he’s a chef from one of the local restaurants. He’s all, “I need fresh basil for my pasta!” I’m thinkin’, “Mate, I’m not a supermarket!” But I give him some anyway. Gotta keep the locals happy, right?

UK’s first outdoor citrus grove planted as climate change bears fruit